Holding back: Chapter 7
Written on: December 20, 2008
Time: 10:44 PM

Walking her home, it was really very awkward. I didn’t know the reason why I had kissed her back. I knew that I was kissing Michelle but could the reason be because I wanted someone else? My life is in a mess.

“That’s really near my house. How come I never see you on the bus or around my area?”

“That’s simple to answer, I just moved her like a year ago. And my dad usually drives me to and from school. And it’s because you don’t notice me most of the time; but I do.”

Wow, I must really be blind. Michelle might be a very talkative girl but she has an attractive side as well; looking at her now, I realized that she has a beautiful smile that just makes me want to smile when I look at her. She might be in her PJs, a simple black tank top and long pants, but…

WHAT AM I THINKING ABOUT HERE! Stop it Yiwei, control yourself.

“Err… I’ll send you upstairs?”

Telling me it wasn’t necessary, she pecked my cheek and went into the lift. Waving at her, she smiled and wave back.

What’s going on here? How did I, a person who was no one, become so wanted? Walking home I realized that I was actually smiling; I was actually happy.

Checking my phone in the morning, I noticed that I received two messages, one from Weiqi and the other from Michelle; Weiqi asked me why hadn't I woke her up and also apologized for not waiting for me, as for Michelle, she wished me good morning. Replying both of them, I proceeded to make breakfast for myself.

Even before I could start on my preparations for breakfast, I heard my mobile. Seeing that Michelle had replied my message saying that she was hungry and that no one was home at the moment. Deciding what to reply her, I went to look for some ‘nicer than usual’ clothes to wear. Deciding on a plain tee-shirt and Bermuda, I replied her message asking to have breakfast instead of staying home and stone.

A replying came soon after asking me whether I could give her around fifteen minutes to get ready, telling her to take her time and that I’d meet her at her lift lobby. For some reason I was feeling a mix of excitement and also anxiousness, I wanted to go out with her.

Walking to her block, I saw that she was already there waiting for me. Waving at her I smiled; walking towards me she said hello with a shy look on her face. She looked cute with her hair tied up and in her outfit, shorts and a short-sleeved blouse; I’d not expected myself to say this but she was actually very pretty. Having just been casual friends, I never really took notice in her but right now, she really did look different.

Asking her what she was hungry for, she told me that she wanted to eat chicken rice; we decided to go to a nearby coffee shop to get her chicken rice. On the way to the coffee shop I asked her why she liked me, telling her that I was such a boring person.

“Err… are you always so gloomy? I had a crush on you back in year one when you help me answer a question that I had no idea how to answer. I guess I saw you as someone who was kind and also quiet but willing to help people in need of help. Ah… let’s not talk about me. I feel that I’m the one who is boring not you.” Seeing that she was blushing I started to blush too.

After eating and having a good laugh with her, I asked her if she wanted to catch a movie with me, Twilight. She told me that one of her girlfriend had already booked her to watch that movie but insisted that we still go to the movies but catch a different movie.

On the bus to the shopping centre she fell asleep on my shoulder again; this girl either like my shoulder a lot or never got a good night sleep the night before but she really looks cute sleeping.

Wondering to myself; do I really like her or am I just using her as someone I can use; surely I am not the kind of person who would use another person for my own selfish desires. Should I give myself a chance with her? Why is it that everything’s moving so quickly these few days? But thinking about the situation, the person I should be with should be the one who is single. Why do I have to be the one breaking hearts to get to another and besides Michelle is actually quite a fun person to be with?

Reaching the shopping centre, I patted Michelle’s hand to wake her up. Opening her eyes I told her that we’ve reached. Walking down the bus I waited for her to get down the bus; stretching out my hand and held hers…