Holding back: Chapter 9
Written on: August 27, 2009
Time: 11:14 PM

Sometimes I wonder to myself is it really true that wad you see with your own eye is really the truth? Why was it that she choose Junjie instead of me? Was it by chance or was it fate that brought Michelle and me together? Even if I wanted to find the answer, I know that it would just be impossible; I am no god. 

"Hey there babe, was in the shower just now. Was there anything you wanted to tell me just now?" 

Everything between Michelle and me was just going great, but sometimes you wonder; is great really a good thing? We've been together for around three months now but even so sometimes I feel that I don't really know her as well as I should. Even if everyone tells me that we are really suitable for each other, there is just that divide that's just there. 

Waiting for her message to come,  I just sat in my living room  and mindlessly watch the tv. A few minutes later her reply came. Telling me that she just wanted to meet at the coffeshop we usually huant, I told her that I'd be there in round five minutes.

"Hey dear! Eh.. Why do you look like you've not been sleeping for days?"

Trying to change to another subject, I told her it was because of the projects that were going to be due soon. We ordered our dinner and continue chatting like we usually do. 

"..hey Yiwei, you know this guy Lawrence from our Thursday's module? So Charlene says that he's interested in getting to know me. I just laughed my way out of that. Haha.. "

"So I now have rival for my girl?"

Telling me that he had no chance what so ever Michelle said softly as though talking to herself, "Are you jealous?"

Telling her that that was definitely not the case, I continued feasting on my meal. 

"Micelle, have I been a good boyfriend to you and be honest." 

With a frown, she told me that she never regretted like me and also had the best time with me. Smiling, she told me not to think so much. 

Finishing our food and having a short stroll around our neighbourhood we decided to head home. While sending Michelle home, she suddenly hugged my arm and placed her head on my shoulder and said in a whisper, "I wish we can stay like this as long as possible. I really enjoy being your girl Yiwei."

Stopping there I gave her a hug and told her that I really enjoy being with her too. 

Walking home, I wondered to myself whether I made the right choice? I do like Michelle but why do I still feel confused? Can I just stop thinking so much like what she told me and just be happy with her. 

I want to be happy with her...   
Written on: July 30, 2009
Time: 1:11 AM

Red rose draft 3
Written on: July 2, 2009
Time: 3:56 PM

“You know, I am not here to kill you; I really do have nothing else better to do and thought that it would be fun following you and giving you a scare, but judging from the way you are looking at me it seems that I not only gave you a good scare. Haha, I am usually not this talkative either.”

Not being able to talk, move or even think all I could do is stare back at her. Her smile never failed to stay on her perfect face. Opening my mouth and closing it again in hesitance, she smiled even brighter and told me just speak my mind.

Seeing as I was still hesitant to speak she said, “Mmm, you do know that I won’t bite you. Just ask anything you want; my age, what am I, how I got here faster than you? Anything that comes to mind; by the way my name is Roselle Knowls, just call me Rose.”

The first thing that came to my lips were why her eyes were such I fierce shade of ruby red. Looking at me like that was the simplest piece in the jigsaw puzzle she said in a neutral matter-of-fact tone that she wasn’t human.

“Don’t you know that it is considered very rude when a lady introduces herself to you and you just ignore it? Isn’t it only polite to introduce yourself to her; even in this generation?” Blushing like an idiot, I told her that my name was Zacarius Archer or Zac for short.

Testing out my name out loud, she finally nodded her auburn head and said she would call me Mr. Archer instead, but while she said that she did not once look up at me. I wonder what she was thinking of.

“Eh, Rose? Are you alright?” I seem to be missing something very important in this conversation.

Interrupting my chain of thought she replied saying that it was something unimportant.

“Oh, look at the time I’ve gotta run. See you around Mr. Archer.” Spinning around to look at how late it was I saw that it was already a quarter past five in the morning; wanting to ask her how she was going to get home, I was just staring into the emptiness of my room.

Noticing something on my side table I picked it up. It was a simple note written in an incredibly beautiful handwriting saying, “This isn’t a dream Mr. Archer.” And sign off with a lipstick make at the bottom.

What the hell? Who was this girl that can just come and go as she like and really, what was she?
Red rose draft 2
Written on: June 28, 2009
Time: 3:43 AM

“W, who are you? And how did you manage to get into my house?”

Smiling at me with such a casual matter-of-fact look, she said in a whisper the door was wide open.

Taking a step back in fear of this girl who was sitting on my bed, I noticed that there was something wrong with her printed t-shirt; it wasn’t printings at all but instead blood stains! Did she come to my house to have me killed like that last person whose blood still remains ever present on her t-shirt?

Trying to calm myself down I asked her, “Then what are you doing here?”

Still smiling, she told me that she had nothing else better to do and decided to stalk her stalker.

Realizing that she was referring to me, my heart skipped a beat. How did she manage to... no wait, am I having a dream? This has got to be a dream. Everything just doesn’t make any sense; the way she got into my room, the reason why and most importantly the way she looks; high cheek bones with blush cheeks, lushes lips and fiercely ruby red eyes that seems to be set on fire. To say it simply she’s a beauty and truly one-of-a-kind.

Without even thinking I asked her whether this was a dream.

She burst into a fit of laughter. A moment later she noticeably tries not to laugh and said “Does my stalker regret stalking me now that I’m the one stalking instead?”

“Oh, you noticed the blood on my t-shirt huh?”

Was that the only thing that seems weird to her? What about breaking into my house? Come on wake up; got to try closing my eyes. WAKE UP!

Smelling her perfume getting stronger I knew that she was getting closer to me she broke the silence by whispering into my ear, “You know, closing your eyes won’t change a thing.”

Resigning to my fate I opened my eyes to see an amused looking girl looking at me.
Red rose draft 1
Written on: June 22, 2009
Time: 2:13 AM





When the gear of destiny starts spinning, there is no sure way of telling when it’ll ever stop spinning. Even if it was just for a moment, misfortune or incredible luck could be the result and even so, the impact of that destiny can last for as long as a life time.

No matter how much I regret what I’ve done nothing will bring you back…
How much longer do I need to wait till I am back in your arms…?
Is this my punishment for what I’ve done to you…?

22st June xx09
Roaming aimlessly around the city in the early hours of the new morning, I stopped to notice that there was someone standing alone outside a pub looking around as if she was looking for someone.

“Who could have been so evil to leave a girl outside of a pub?” I wondered to myself unconsciously. Taking a closer look at her I noticed that she was just simply gorgeous; she might have just been in a simple white printed t-shirt and skinny jeans but her features just stood out. Without a doubt she has to be one of the prettiest girls I have seen in my life; with her long naturally wavy auburn hair, lushes lips and smoldering eyes, I couldn’t take my eyes off of her.

Getting closer to her I noticed that she was holding onto something small and shiny, thinking it was just her handphone I decided not to go any closer, not wanting to disturb her from whatever conversation she was having. Even so I couldn’t bear taking my eyes off her; turning around to get a last look at her I noticed that she was not longer in front of the pub. Cursing on my bad luck I decided that maybe it was a sign that I should just head home and worry about not being able to take my ‘eyes’ off my work a bit later in the day.

One more corner and I’ll be back home; making the last turn I noticed something in one of my bikes side mirrors; it was the same girl I saw in front of the pub just now. But how can that be? This is not right, even if it was just coincidence it was impossible because from the way she looked in the mirror, she seemed to have the same look as she did in front of the pub. Starting to get freaked out I tried not to think so much about it, maybe it was just my eyes playing tricks on me since I was already very tired.

Getting off my bike I did not once looked back on my way home. Reaching for my key and having a sense of relief that I was just one step home, I stopped dead in my tracks. I sensed something standing behind me, there was also a light scent of floral perfume in the background. How can that be possible, if there was someone behind me, I would definitely have seen the person walk behind me since there is only one lift and one corridor to my house.

All my senses told me that I should not even think about turning around, instead it told me ‘get into your house quick’. Pushing in my key and turn it, I was glad that it gave no resistance and work like it should. Without a moments hesitance I reached for my lights and locked my door. My heart start beating like there’s no tomorrow, I could still smell the perfume but now even stronger. Spinning towards the scent even with every warning from every cell of my body I noticed that it was just some scents my sister was burning in her pot. Sighing with relief and a bit of disappointment quickly took off my shoes. Tomorrow’s going to be a long day; I don’t need to give myself a good scare just before I go to sleep. Laughing at my stupidity I walked to my room.

“What took you so long?” said the girl from the pub. I froze not knowing what to do. Please, please tell me this is a dream..
Written on: May 7, 2009
Time: 12:55 AM

I know that this blog seems dead, which is true, but i will be continuing the story in a few days time. To the people who read it i am sorry that chapter 9 took so long, i jus didn't have the right set of mind to get the story moving; excuses aside, the next post will be out soon.. =]]

To Kelvin Foo!! CONGRATS ON YOUR MARRIAGE!!!=]] Kelvin has been a friend, mentor and oso someone i look up to and i am very honored to have witness your marriage.. =]] kakakaka.... I think i have found someone too...

Ok ok enough of my nonsense... THE POST WILL BE UP IN A FEW DAYS!
Holding back: Chapter 8
Written on: December 28, 2008
Time: 2:15 PM

Sometimes when there are too many to choose from sometimes the best choice would be just choosing the one that catches your eye first? Maybe for some situations but not all I guess.

“Ah… there aren’t many movies to watch. Why not you choose? I’ll be fine with anything; even if you don’t want to watch any.” Damn I am useless; bring her to the movies when there isn’t much to watch. I feel like shooting myself.

“I think I want to watch. Err… how about the one with Keanu Reeves? Doesn’t look that bad?”

Paying for the tickets, we still had about twenty minutes before the movie starts deciding to go MacDonald’s to get an ice-cream.

It was quite hard for me to believe that I am actually with Michelle, what more I held her hand. I guess I do enjoy being with her from long ago but I never expected this. Even though we might still feel a bit awkward together, it felt good to be going out with someone that actually likes me for me.

“Michelle? I’m sorry that I am so lousy at starting up a conversation. I know I can be boring at times. Sorry.”

Looking at me with an angry look she said, “Why is it that you always look down on yourself Yiwei?” looking a bit softer, “I’m sorry, but I like you like that, you don’t have to always think about what to say next you know? Even I don’t know what to say sometimes. I just feel happy you know?” holding my hand a bit tighter, “you know, I didn’t even expect myself to kiss you yesterday, it just happened. Haha and I’m just glad I did.”

Squeezing her hand back, I told her that I was sorry again and gave her a screwed look and a salute saying yes ma’am. Starting to laugh again I thought to myself, maybe this is for the best; I mean we are both happy with each other and there was nothing holding us back.

Reaching MacDonald's, I asked her what she wanted ordering, I felt my mobile vibrate. Taking it out of my pocket I saw that Weiqi called. I panicked.

“Err… sorry Michelle I got to take this phone call, wait for me awhile.”

“Weiqi?” saying her name with a weird tone.

“Am I disturbing you Yiwei? I hope I am not. I just called to tell you that I got discharged from the hospital. Haha, see you soon?”

Telling her that that was good we wished each other goodbye I hung the call.

Walking to Michelle, she asked me who that was. Telling her that it was one of my friends getting discharged from the hospital, she asked me whether it was Weiqi, feeling a bit shocked I asked her how she knew who it was. She told me that almost the whole school knew that she fainted on Friday and that I sent her to the hospital. Asking if she was alright, I told her that she just fainted because of exhaustion.

Damn, why do I have to feel so guilty all of a sudden? Breathe idiot, breathe!

Finishing our ice-cream, she said, “I think we should go up soon our movie’s gonna start soon.”

While going up, I knew that something was wrong because for one thing was that she didn’t talk to me and the silence was starting to get very awkward.

Calling her name, I asked her if the call was bothering her. Shaking her head, she said that I was thinking too much into it.

Sitting at our seats, I couldn’t help think that whatever thought that were swimming in her head, it would be thought that I know was bothering her. She didn’t talk much less even held my hand after the call. Why did I have to panic? Why did I have to ruin a perfect day?

“Can you stop thinking and start pampering me? I want popcorn, POPCORN!” she started hammering on my arm with her fist while smiling.

“Ok, ok! Ouch, I’m going! Relax popcorn on the way!” turning to face her, “Michelle? I like you too.”

Passing the popcorn to her, she lifted the armrest to sit closer to me.

Halfway through the movie I could tell that she wasn’t really paying attention to the movie because she was really very fidgety; more like she was playing with me throughout the movie, but seriously the movie was very boring that I didn’t mind at all. Feeding me popcorn, holding my hand, throwing popcorn around and lots more weird but funny stuff.

“Yiwei, how much longer is the movie?”

“About an hour more I think? You’re not enjoying the movie huh?”

Laughing sheepishly she said, “Yea, lousy choice of a movie huh? Haha...”

Putting my arm around her, I brought her closer to me, bringing my face closer to hers I told her to close her eyes, kissing her forehead I moved down to her lips. Tasting her soft sweet lips, I started kissing her with more passion.

Snuggling closer to each other, she softly said "more…"


HELLO PEEPS! Sorry this chapter took such a long time, it's one of the most difficult chapters i had to do, editting was a bitch.. hahaha.. the story will have its twist and turns.. hope you guys like it, but till den stay tuned!!!!!!! =]]